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About Literature / Student Member witwitchFemale/Finland Group :iconcunninglinguists: CunningLinguists
 
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The stone weight
of my chest drags
my chin to the ground, and it scrapes
across the cold concrete as I scutter
sideways, a crab without her shell.

The sea is distant as the sky,
the hard fact I will never be home
pulses from head to tips of limbs
like a chronic lightning.

I hope the world looks only
at my claws
and thinks me powerful.
I want to taste the Camel Crush
you've already smoked.
I want the sweat of your palms
on my back;
I trust your teeth
against my throat.

And if you want,
you can have my American Spirit lips;
if you ask,
I will give you my fingers in your hair
and trace my nails down your spine.

But only if
these things will make you happy:
for that, I can
live without them.
Consent
Trying to write about sexual tension between friends who respect each other. That's the sort of sexual tension I want to build in the novel I'm writing.

Critique welcome! :D
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witwitch

Artist | Student | Literature
Finland
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Critiques


Their relationship is so cute, they seem like a pair of real teenagers in puppy love. :meow: Sometimes I would get a bit confused when you w...

by merrak

You've got a solid voice here, and I like the language. In part one, I feel like you've very much nailed the way children think. On the...

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Comments


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:iconjade-pandora:
jade-pandora Featured By Owner 4 days ago
MenInASuitcase  WISHING YOU THE BEST BIRTHDAY EVER! PARTY HARD 
Reply
:iconjchrispole:
Jchrispole Featured By Owner 4 days ago
I've come to wish you a happy birthday, Ms. Wit! 

Unfortunately I can't get you a gift because...well...I don't know where you live.

Or what you like...

Or your preference for wrapping paper. 

So I guess in this instance, it's the thought that counts, right? 
Reply
:iconsapphire-ashesx:
Sapphire-Ashesx Featured By Owner 4 days ago
Happy birthday!
Reply
:iconsemi-surreal:
semi-surreal Featured By Owner Oct 13, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Happy (early) Birthday, young lady!

You should use one of them online birthday calculators to see how close you might be to your 10,000th day (let us know).
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Oct 11, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Mm, you alive?
Reply
:iconwitwitch:
witwitch Featured By Owner Oct 12, 2014  Student Writer
Sort of. Lol
Reply
:iconyour-first-boyfriend:
your-first-boyfriend Featured By Owner Oct 12, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
I think I was gonna ask you for a critique but in hindsight I was very tired and not thinking straight and for some reason the idea of a critique is scary. :noes:
Reply
:iconwitwitch:
witwitch Featured By Owner Oct 12, 2014  Student Writer
Don't be scared. :meow:
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconbloodshotink:
BloodshotInk Featured By Owner Apr 28, 2014
Thanks for the fave!
Reply
:icondragonetteeye:
DragonetteEye Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2014
😘♥ ♡ If I don't get this back I'm obviously not a close friend. Now I have a game for you. it's been played since 1977. Once you read this you have to send it to 10 people. Your next 5 days will be like this:  
~Day 1~ You will wake up to the biggest shock of your life.   
~Day 2~ You will cross paths with an old friend you have missed.  
~Day 3~ You will find yourself with alot of money.  
~Day 4~ Your day will be perfect.  
~Day 5~ The love of your life  will hug you... If you don't forward this your next 5 days will be the EXACT OPPOSITE
Reply
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